Start again

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I have been neglecting this blog. I have been neglecting myself. In Miles’ first year of life my main focus was him and rightfully so. I sacrificed sleep, my body, my heart, my life to keep him alive. It was the best, most important work I have ever done.
Now that Miles is a year old, transitioning from sweet, bouncing baby to a screaming, silly, wild toddler- I am finding myself again. If you have a baby under the age of one I am thinking of you. Sending you light and love in this season of raising your little one. This post may not resonate with you right now. In this season of life with your babe- give yourself so much grace. Forgive yourself everything and love yourself well. Now is a time to lean into convenience and easy buttons. Now is a time to be so very gentle with yourself.
If you are beyond age one, if you are looking to care for your heart and your mind and to nourish your soul- read on sister.
As soon as the sun set on Christmas day, presents opened and family loved well, I had my eyes on 2019. Ready for newness. Ready to thank and close this past year and plan for the next. One of my favorite content creators, Muchelle B., has a wonderful video series to help you plan and prep for the new year. (Find the video series here.) I have distilled her content into a format that was inspiring and meaningful for me below.
First, my wins of 2018. What went well? What needs to be celebrated? We kept a human alive for a whole year, we found the most perfect family to care for baby while we work, we bought a house, we celebrated one year of marriage, we hiked, we rescued two new pets (Moose & Marie), I worked for and transitioned to a new job, I did some very helpful therapy, I worked through traumas and toward personal growth, I read some beautiful books, and we decluttered and reordered our home to better fit our 2019 goals.
What are your wins from 2018? (If you need help making your list look back at social media, journals, or your camera roll on your phone for highlights.)
Next, life lessons of 2018. With all the wins of 2018 there were also some lows and losses. And from them I’ve learned so much: I am loved, unconditionally. I am in control of my life, my emotions and what I make happen. I am bright and beautiful and capable no matter what my subconscious tries to tell me. I am a badass.
What did 2018 teach you? Make a list on paper or on your notes app, after you’ve made your list thank 2018 for its highs and lows, for its wins and losses. No year is all good or all bad, thank you 2018.
Now that 2018 is a wrap I am looking for 2019 focusing on the three questions: what, why, and how? What do I want to achieve? Why do I want to achieve it? How will I do it?
We may think we know what we hope and plan to do in the coming year but if we don’t take the time to create it and write it down our chance of success is not high. The power of writing down your goals is real, just ask Rachel Hollis. As you do this make sure you keep your eyes on your own page. It doesn’t matter what your goals and dreams look like next to someone else’s- that’s not your life. It doesn’t matter if your dreams are big and bold and crazy and real, don’t limit yourself, don’t compare yourself.
If you need some inspiration for the coming year try making a vision board. To save on paper waste and reduce clutter I make my vision board on Pinterest, click here to see mine so far.
It can also help to have a word (or words) for the year. My 2019 word is adventure. Some of my supporting words are: freedom, nature, outdoors, camping, hiking, open air, simplify, French, simplicity, Paris, Parisian and magnificent. In 2019 I want to be free, healthy, strong, Parisian, at peace and full of energy. The actions I take will align with these words and ideas.
I have already started walking around the house pretending I’m in Paris and saying to Chase, “how very French,” about my own actions, it makes us laugh but it also adds intention and mindfulness to my daily actions. I’ve swapped out many inexpensive household items for second hand, high quality, french inspired homewares that will last us a lifetime. We’ve let go of the TV in our main living room and created a beautiful, happy space free of technology. I’ve already noticed I’m thinking and moving more- leaning into adventure.
What is your word this year? What word or idea keeps coming to you and won’t leave you alone- feed what you are drawn to. The universe is calling.
My final tip for planning the year ahead is to create “start” and “stop” lists. What are the things you would like to stop doing? What would you like to start?
I would like to stop: making so much waste, spending money on items that won’t last a lifetime, buying things Miles doesn’t need, spending mindless time on TV and phone, spending money we don’t have, eating food that doesn’t nourish my body and mind.
I would like to start: buying for life, going on adventures with Miles, only watching TV in our family room, saving up money and paying off debts, eating more plants healthy fats and grains, packing snacks and lunches, drinking more tea than coffee.
What ever has happened this past year, be thankful for where it has brought you. Where you are now is where you’re meant to be.
“And suddenly you know…it’s time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings.”
Don’t live the same year for 85 years and call it a life, each new moment is a chance to start again.
More soon,
Bonnie Rae xx
More inspiration:
Muchelle B.
Rachel Hollis
Simple Sophisticate Podcast

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